homosexual adoption

[Star2589]

there's no reason not to allow gays to adopt. studies show that children from homosexual parents are just as well adjusted as those from heterosexual parents. I posted the following in another thread:

Quote by: star2589 Donor insemination: child development and family functioning in lesbian mother families.] The quality of the couples' relationships and the quality of the mother-child interaction did not differ between lesbian mother families and either of the heterosexual family groups. The quality of the interaction between the social mother and the child in lesbian families was superior to that between the father and the child in both groups of heterosexual families. Childrens' own perception of their parents was similar in all family types; the social mother in lesbian families was regarded by the child to be as much a 'parent' as the father in both types of heterosexual families. With regard to their emotional/behavioural development, boys and girls raised in lesbian mother families were well adjusted and their gender role development did not differ from that of children raised in heterosexual families. These results indicate that child and family development in lesbian mother families is similar to that of heterosexual families. Children raised in fatherless families from infancy: a follow-up of children of lesbian and single heterosexual mothers at early adolescence. The presence or absence of a father in the home from the outset does appear to have some influence on adolescents' relationships with their mothers. However, being without a resident father from infancy does not seem to have negative consequences for children. In addition, there is no evidence that the sexual orientation of the mother influences parent-child interaction or the socioemotional development of the child. Children with lesbian parents: A community study. Thirty-nine lesbian-mother families, 74 two-parent heterosexual families, and 60 families headed by single heterosexual mothers were compared on standardized interview and questionnaire measures administered to mothers, co-mothers/fathers, children, and teachers. Findings are in line with those of earlier investigations showing positive mother-child relationships and well-adjusted children. Lesbian mothers, gay fathers, and their children: a review. There is a variety of families headed by a lesbian or gay male parent or same-sex couple. Findings from research suggest that children with lesbian or gay parents are comparable with children with heterosexual parents on key psychosocial developmental outcomes. In many ways, children of lesbian or gay parents have similar experiences of family life compared with children in heterosexual families. Adults raised as children in lesbian families. A longitudinal study of 25 young adults from lesbian families and 21 raised by heterosexual single mothers revealed that those raised by lesbian mothers functioned well in adulthood in terms of psychological well-being and of family identity and relationships. The commonly held assumption that lesbian mothers will have lesbian daughters and gay sons was not supported by the findings. Children in lesbian and single-parent households: psychosexual and psychiatric appraisal. Thirty-seven school-age children reared in 27 lesbian households were compared with 38 school-age children reared in 27 heterosexual single-parent households, with respect to their psychosexual development and their emotions, behaviour and relationships. Systematic standardized interviews with the mothers and with the children, together with parent and teacher questionnaires, were used to make the psychosexual and psychiatric appraisal. The two groups did not differ in terms of their gender identity, sex role behaviour or sexual orientation. Also, they did not differ on most measures of emotions, behaviour and relationships--although there was some indication of more frequent psychiatric problems in the single-parent group. It was concluded that rearing in a lesbian household per se did not lead to atypical psychosexual development or constitute a psychiatric risk factor.

why is gay adoption even debated when the scientific evidence so overwhelmingly supports it?

[whoracle]

honestly, jerk, i'd say that's a noble cause. i'd also regretfully say that the reason most people have been and are against it but won't admit to is that they know those children will be chided and mistreated in school and/or other situations. adolescense is hard enough without any added flaws (whether said flaws are imagined or not). does a child deserve to carry that weight for no reason other than its circumstance?

i'm not saying i's right. i'm saying its reality.

at the same time, any family no matter what it's core components, is perfectly capable of rearing children. the question is - until our society is more tolerant - do we trade the mental wellbeing of an innocent for the politically correct rights of a couple who cannot breed?

there was a time not so long ago that coming from a broken home was enough to classify a child as an outcast. and as i'm sure you're all aware, that's no longer the case. i'm sure the same will be true of this. in time. until then it is a sad dilemma because there is a large segment of people who will never *stop worrying about sexual preferences*. that will take a few more generations.

my honest belief is that a gay couple who often wait years for a child they desperately desire are often better parents than heteros. the problem is, that it doesn't change the opinion of the general population. and judging by the way they shot down gay marriage i'd say their opinion is pretty clear.

[Star2589]

Quote by: whoracle do we trade the mental wellbeing of an innocent for the politically correct rights of a couple who cannot breed?

there is no trade. its been well demonstrated that kids from gay families are just as well adjusted as those from straight families.

also, the greater the pool of applicants to adopt, the more children can be adopted into good homes.

[Sonart]

.

Quote by: Whoracle i'm not saying i's right. i'm saying its reality.

Maybe, maybe not. TIME Magazine did a cover story on gay teens in America. Among their findings was that more teens were coming out, were coming out earlier, and that teens today, being raised in a culture where homosexuals have been more open and visible, are far more tolerant of homosexuality than their parents.

This matches with a report on NPR about a poll done by (Q, Cue, Kew?) Research, in which it was determined that anti-gay sentiments were dramatically lower among people who actually know some gay people.

.

[dereksdiamond]

I dont actually see a problem with homosexuals adopted. Well not at least until studies show the children are being affected. Homosexual adoption seem to me that may cause a little unbalance within child. Especially when he or she is at the age to attend school. What will the child think when others are talking about their mother and father and he or she only has two of the same? Will the child feel that he or she may not fit in?

[whoracle]

Quote by: Sonart . Maybe, maybe not. TIME Magazine did a cover story on gay teens in America. Among their findings was that more teens were coming out, were coming out earlier, and that teens today, being raised in a culture where homosexuals have been more open and visible, are far more tolerant of homosexuality than their parents. This matches with a report on NPR about a poll done by (Q, Cue, Kew?) Research, in which it was determined that anti-gay sentiments were dramatically lower among people who actually know some gay people.

that is definitely encouraging. but i think much of it depends on environment. sadly, not all gay couples move to tolerant neighborhoods.
thank you for the link, sonart. i'll share it with a girlfriend of mine who is also looking to adopt with her partner. she shares my fears, and i believe it will do her some good. :)

[SoccerfreakAB2]

Quote by: whoracle honestly, jerk, i'd say that's a noble cause. i'd also regretfully say that the reason most people have been and are against it but won't admit to is that they know those children will be chided and mistreated in school and/or other situations. adolescense is hard enough without any added flaws (whether said flaws are imagined or not). does a child deserve to carry that weight for no reason other than its circumstance? i'm not saying i's right. i'm saying its reality. at the same time, any family no matter what it's core components, is perfectly capable of rearing children. the question is - until our society is more tolerant - do we trade the mental wellbeing of an innocent for the politically correct rights of a couple who cannot breed? there was a time not so long ago that coming from a broken home was enough to classify a child as an outcast. and as i'm sure you're all aware, that's no longer the case. i'm sure the same will be true of this. in time. until then it is a sad dilemma because there is a large segment of people who will never *stop worrying about sexual preferences*. that will take a few more generations. my honest belief is that a gay couple who often wait years for a child they desperately desire are often better parents than heteros. the problem is, that it doesn't change the opinion of the general population. and judging by the way they shot down gay marriage i'd say their opinion is pretty clear.

I guess it depends what you're trying to raise- a high school prom king or a future success in the real world. But I totally see your point that could ruin the future success if such emotional breaks occur due to the homosexual parent teasing.

[Jack]

Oh foo, I thought this was a thread about adopting homosexuals.
Well, if anyone's interested, I can be had...I mean I'm available...Oh, forget it. :confused:

[underbear1]

Maybe the LGBT community could just get custody of the gay and lesbian youths, it'd certainly make it a helluva lot easier to come out, with your sanity and self respect intact.

[tman_ndsu08]

If a gay couple can provide a higher quality of life for an adoptee, I see nothing wrong with it.

[weasel]

In spite of the research posted, I believe that a homosexual couple cannot provide a child a proper upbringing in terms of the benefits that only a heterosexual couple can offer. Having two "Moms" or two "Dads" deprives the child of the assets the other sex can provide. Argueably, having a mother and father balances the rearing of a child who needs both the maternal instincts / feelings of the mother and the protective behavior of the father.

Apparently, the state of Arkansas agrees with me:
http://www.narth.com/docs/RationaleBasisFinal0405.pdf

Some exerts for those who will be too lazy to read my evidence:

"The inherent nature and structure of households with a homosexually-behaving
adult uniquely endangers foster children by exposing them to a substantial level of harmful
stresses that are over and above usual stress levels in heterosexual foster homes."

"The inherent structure of foster-parent households with one or more
homosexually-behaving members deprives foster children of vitally needed positive
contributions to child adjustment that are only present in licensed heterosexual foster homes."

"Homosexual partner relationships are significantly and substantially less stable and
more short-lived on the average compared to a marriage of a man and a woman, thereby
inevitably contributing to a substantially higher rate of household transitions in foster homes with a homosexually-behaving adult."

Homosexuality is a deviation in the natural order of things (most people are "straight" not "gay"). Such a deviation should not be allowed to follow through to the raising of a child. I am not a parent so my qualification and bias on this topic is questionable. However, I would hope that there are some heterosexual partners out there who could relate and support my observation.

[tman_ndsu08]

Would you then say that children raised by homosexual couples have at least as good of an upbringing as those raised by single parents?

[weasel]

Quote by: tman_ndsu08 Would you then say that children raised by homosexual couples have at least as good of an upbringing as those raised by single parents?

An excellent point. However, in terms of the fragile state homosexual couples exist in, I think that the single parented child would be better off because he/she would exist in a more stable environment. Both, however, are deprived of a potentially richer upbringing.

[tman_ndsu08]

What basis do you have for claiming that homosexual couples are poor and unstable?

[underbear1]

I don't think weasel meant wealth as his richer upbringing, I think it's the exposure to bluecollar comics, parenting skills of Britney Spears, and stable marriages of Eminem, and Nascar race watching that really helps raise well adjusted children, and they'd never get that from their queer parents.

[weasel]

Quote by: tman_ndsu08 What basis do you have for claiming that homosexual couples are poor and unstable?

I never said that homosexual couples were poor (in the financial sense). What I am stating is that such relationships are inheritantly unstable, therefore, it would be innapropriate to place a child in such an environment.

http://www.narth.com/docs/RationaleBasisFinal0405.pdf

"Homosexually-behaving adults inherently suffer significantly and substantially higher rates of partner relationship breakups, psychological disorder, suicidal ideation, suicidal attempt, completed suicide, conduct disorder, and substance abuse; therefore, as a group, households with a resident homosexually-behaving adult are substantially less capable of providing the best psychologically stable and secure home environments needed by foster children. This greater instability would inevitably necessitate more frequent foster child removal for transition to an alternate foster placement. Further, this relationship instability in households with a homosexually-behaving male also would contribute to a potentially higher risk of removal due to the sexual abuse of an adolescent male foster child by that homosexual. Foster children have already suffered one or more traumatic transitions, and more frequent transitions result in greater psychological harm and psychosocial maladjustment. The Adoption Assistance and Child Welfare Act of 1980 Public Law 92-272 shifted the focus of the foster care system to minimizing child removal rates, and Public Law 105-89 requires practices to enhance safety of the foster child. It is in the best interests of foster children to be placed in foster homes that include only married or single heterosexual adults because they are substantially more stable and safe,
eliminating the unique risk of higher rates of child removal inherent to households with a
homosexual adult."

Had you read this link when I posted it earlier, I would not need to go out of my way to explain this to you.

This isn't about the "denying the rights of gay people." This about the well-being of children who would be in better hands with a heterosexual couple.

[underbear1]

Seems heterosexuals just aren't stepping up to the plate, otherwise hundred of thousand adoptable children wouldn't be languishing in foster care homes, which are a nightmare, my friend was in 35 foster homes before he was 8 years old, and BOTH he and his mentally handicapped sister were sexually and physically abused in more than one of those homes.so straights.............put up or shut up!
btw. some gay couples are adopting mixed racial, and children born with HIV or born addicted to narcotics/alcohol that no one else is offering a G*D DAMN HOME!

[weasel]

Quote by: underbear1 Seems heterosexuals just aren't stepping up to the plate, otherwise hundred of thousand adoptable children wouldn't be languishing in foster care homes, which are a nightmare, my friend was in 35 foster homes before he was 8 years old, and [b]BOTH he and his mentally handicapped sister were sexually and physically abused in more than one of those homes:

Your example is noted (although some research / evidence would be helpful in backing your story up). However, this is one failed adoption out of hundreds of thousands (possibly millions) of succesful adoptions; of course there is going to be instances such as the one you described (in statistics it's called the normal distribution). Adoption is notorious for its red tape and cost which I think is one contributing reason to why so many are left unadopted; people just don't want to deal with that stuff and it's sad.

At the risk of repeating myself, I believe that homosexual couples are INCAPABLE of providing a proper environment necessary for the successful upbringing of a child. I am not saying that gays are less compasionate than ordinary people and their willingness to adopt is admirable. However, people are selfishly thinking about their own desire for a child and not what is best for him / her. One would think that first rule of parenting would be to put the child, not oneself, first.

[Lullaby Chainer]

Quote by: weasel In spite of the research posted, I believe that a homosexual couple cannot provide a child a proper upbringing in terms of the benefits that only a heterosexual couple can offer. Having two "Moms" or two "Dads" deprives the child of the assets the other sex can provide. Argueably, having a mother and father balances the rearing of a child who needs both the maternal instincts / feelings of the mother and the protective behavior of the father. Apparently, the state of Arkansas agrees with me: http://www.narth.com/docs/RationaleBasisFinal0405.pdf Some exerts for those who will be too lazy to read my evidence: "The inherent nature and structure of households with a homosexually-behaving adult uniquely endangers foster children by exposing them to a substantial level of harmful stresses that are over and above usual stress levels in heterosexual foster homes." "The inherent structure of foster-parent households with one or more homosexually-behaving members deprives foster children of vitally needed positive contributions to child adjustment that are only present in licensed heterosexual foster homes." "Homosexual partner relationships are significantly and substantially less stable and more short-lived on the average compared to a marriage of a man and a woman, thereby inevitably contributing to a substantially higher rate of household transitions in foster homes with a homosexually-behaving adult." Homosexuality is a deviation in the natural order of things (most people are "straight" not "gay"). Such a deviation should not be allowed to follow through to the raising of a child. I am not a parent so my qualification and bias on this topic is questionable. However, I would hope that there are some heterosexual partners out there who could relate and support my observation.

Anyone else see the sublimanl message?!?!!? =O

Here.. I'll help you..

Quote by: weasel In spite of the research posted, I believe that a homosexual couple cannot provide a child a proper upbringing in terms of the benefits that only a heterosexual couple can offer. Having two "Moms" or two "Dads" deprives the child of the assets the other sex can provide. Argueably, having a mother and father balances the rearing of a child who needs both the maternal instincts / feelings of the mother and the protective behavior of the father. Apparently, the state of Arkansas agrees with me: http://www.narth.com/docs/RationaleBasisFinal0405.pdf Some exerts for those who will be too lazy to read my evidence: "The inherent nature and structure of households with a homosexually-behaving adult uniquely endangers foster children by exposing them to a substantial level of harmful stresses that are over and above usual stress levels in heterosexual foster homes." "The inherent structure of foster-parent households with one or more homosexually-behaving members deprives foster children of vitally needed positive contributions to child adjustment that are only present in licensed heterosexual foster homes." "Homosexual partner relationships are significantly and substantially less stable and more short-lived on the average compared to a marriage of a man and a woman, thereby inevitably contributing to a substantially higher rate of household transitions in foster homes with a homosexually-behaving adult." Homosexuality is a deviation in the natural order of things (most people are "straight" not "gay"). Such a deviation should not be allowed to follow through to the raising of a child. I am not a parent so my qualification and bias on this topic is questionable. However, I would hope that there are some heterosexual partners out there who could relate and support my observation.

See it!?!?!?!

vanished

=O

Edit by rcne, I see nothing but a valid debate of the issues. When you interject homophobia into the mix rather than considering the views posted here - it detracts rather than adds to the debate.

[underbear1]

Quote by: weasel Quote by: underbear1 Seems heterosexuals just aren't stepping up to the plate, otherwise hundred of thousand adoptable children wouldn't be languishing in foster care homes, which are a nightmare, my friend was in 35 foster homes before he was 8 years old, and [b]BOTH he and his mentally handicapped sister were sexually and physically abused in more than one of those homes: Your example is noted (although some research / evidence would be helpful in backing your story up). However, this is one failed adoption out of hundreds of thousands (possibly millions) of succesful adoptions; of course there is going to be instances such as the one you described (in statistics it's called the normal distribution). Adoption is notorious for its red tape and cost which I think is one contributing reason to why so many are left unadopted; people just don't want to deal with that stuff and it's sad. At the risk of repeating myself, I believe that homosexual couples are INCAPABLE of providing a proper environment necessary for the successful upbringing of a child. I am not saying that gays are less compasionate than ordinary people and their willingness to adopt is admirable. However, people are selfishly thinking about their own desire for a child and not what is best for him / her. One would think that first rule of parenting would be to put the child, not oneself, first.

Your belief is noted..............so what you believe with no evidence is some how valid. You would deny even one child a loving adopted home because of your predjudicial views about what gay couples are capable of? Here's a clue gays are ordinary and remarkable people, we are also selfish or giving, responsible or can't be bothered EXACTLY like straight people. Some of us will be as good a parent as a straight person, and some will be better, and some will be worse, but don't deny those children a whole class of potential parents, on your "belief".
btw. with donar sperm,and women willing to carry chidren for gay men, your adoption ban won't stop many gays/lesbians from parenting IF THEY CHOSE!
BUT IF YOU ARE SUCESSFUL IN THESE HATEFUL DIVISIVE CAMPAIGN TRICKS of winning another election vilifying queers, at least F*CKIN step up, and adopt the kids in foster homes.