Why do people have children?

[The Bacon Guy]

The obvious answer would be because of an instinct to pass on one's genes. But there must be other reasons.
In my experience, children are expensive, time consuming, loud, demanding, messy and probably the most efficient way of ruining your life I can think of. So why do people do it?

Is it to give your life purpose?
Do you feel that you are giving back something to society?
Does having children give you a sense of importance?
Do you just want some company?

Any mothers, fathers or prospective parents - What do you get out of having children? Somebody help me out, because I really feel I must be missing something.

[brien]

Quote by: The Bacon Guy The obvious answer would be because of an instinct to pass on one's genes. But there must be other reasons. In my experience, children are expensive, time consuming, loud, demanding, messy and probably the most efficient way of ruining your life I can think of. So why do people do it? Is it to give your life purpose? Do you feel that you are giving back something to society? Does having children give you a sense of importance? Do you just want some company? Any mothers, fathers or prospective parents - What do you get out of having children? Somebody help me out, because I really feel I must be missing something.

I am almost 55 and have two kids, one 23 and another 25. Children just happen. Then you deal with them. When they are little they have little problems, and as they grow, so do their problems grow.

I never thought , "oh I want my genes, or my name to live on", or any of that stuff. The wife just turned up pregnant and we dealt with it. After the second child, her "tubes were tied" and that was that, after the birth of my son.

You wrote: In my experience, children are expensive, time consuming, loud, demanding, messy and probably the most efficient way of ruining your life I can think of. So why do people do it?

I answer: One can't put a price on human beings, or the pleasure they bring their parents and those who came before them. Everything you write about kids can be true if you allow it to be true. Surely you must realize that they can be a source of pleasure that no amount of time is wasted nor no amount of money could ever buy.

[dreamer]

Quote by: The Bacon Guy Any mothers, fathers or prospective parents - What do you get out of having children? Somebody help me out, because I really feel I must be missing something.

Everthing ive done for my kids is been for the better than we had what i mean by that is, i no what i have done wrong in my life. So if i can give to them a better life than i had so my family can be inproved from my family. Knowledge is where iam looking, because knowledge is the right path, to where ever it leads ?.
just a point of view by Dreamer.
I have a good life my kids are going in the right direcation all A grade students, And have good morals so othier poeple say. There little bla blas to me but thats life it throws the dust bin lids at you. Oh still working on it thow lol .
Playing football with the lads is brill,and the girls well thats another story "Know" that saying girls will be girls yes they can be well load,music load, hair load cloths load, on and on,well thats all for now. I say kids well be kids. :( .
DREAMER

[Marilyn Monroe]

I don't know why. I think it's youth most of the time. That doesn't account for these grandmothers that are having babies, but there are some odd folks in the world.

You wind up loving your children more than yourself in many cases, and this is not a good thing for them, or you. The problem as I see it is this, we have the children thinking we will live forever, and eventually we will have to leave them, and when that time comes, many children are quite devastated. We have to leave them. If only we really thought of that before we had them there would be a lot less of a population problem.

We aren't doing anybody any favors by giving them life. I don't think it's a favor. It's more of a curse. Life is a terrible hardship, so why would we want to bestow that on anyone? Makes no sense. Kids are terrible at hurting their parents, too. Terrible. So much grief they can cause. Not always planned, but sometimes unbearable grief they cause.

[Kite]

At this point in my life I really don't want to have kids. They mooch at the beginning, the defy you and scream during the middle, and the ignore and disown you at the end. Children are ungrateful greedy little bastards, and I am ashamed to admit that I am one of them.

[Egoist]

Uhh the people that don't have the urge to have children or don't engage in behaviors that produce children don't pass their genes on. Why is sex so fun and feel so good, because the people that didn't enjoy sex never passed their sex enjoying genes on..... Its a question of evolutionary psychology. In this day and age though more people are *waking up* (overriding their evolutionary programing), I for one don't plan on having children unless im fabulously wealthy but then again I do love sex and taking risks....

[Jillamanda]

I think that fundamentally, we do it to perpetuate the species. Girls, in particular, grow up with a notion of being a mother at some stage in the future. Call it a desire to pass on one's genes, call it maternal instinct - at the end of the day, if we stop doing it, our days as a species are numbered.

[Jillamanda]

Quote by: Egoist .... Its a question of evolutionary psychology. In this day and age though more people are *waking up* (overriding their evolutionary programing), I for one don't plan on having children unless im fabulously wealthy but then again I do love sex and taking risks....

Yeah, sometimes you have to wonder how much intervention evolution can take. Lots of people opt not to have kids these days......but there's always Catholics, I guess...

[shield772]

People have children because of a psychological and physical need to reproduce.

[Technosoul]

Were you loud, messy, and did you cause your parents some worries or headaches? Was it worth it all because you are who you are, or not? That answer would determine if you should or should not reproduce your own "little you alls".

Anyway a current report has indicated that because pirates hate kids we have less pirates in the world and that caused global warming because fewer ships were sunk into the oceans.

[Protostar]

Quote by: Jillamanda I think that fundamentally, we do it to perpetuate the species. Girls, in particular, grow up with a notion of being a mother at some stage in the future. Call it a desire to pass on one's genes, call it maternal instinct - at the end of the day, if we stop doing it, our days as a species are numbered.

I disagree. Technology could continue the species if we choose not to engage in the behavior that does. As for children, the only use I would have for a child is to carry on the family name and someone to leave all my wealth to. I HATE children, but see having one as a necessary evil or else watch my lineage end and my wealth wittled away by nobodies.

[tinybear]

Some people have kids because that's what their peers do.

[ForwardMotion]

Quote by: Protostar I disagree. Technology could continue the species if we choose not to engage in the behavior that does. As for children, the only use I would have for a child is to carry on the family name and someone to leave all my wealth to. I HATE children, but see having one as a necessary evil or else watch my lineage end and my wealth wittled away by nobodies.

Wow...you really sound like you shouldn't have children at all. There are many other ways of passing on your money to someone that you can take care of responsibly and such...maybe you can adopt one who is not as young so you don't have to deal with them while they're younger...or find someone in the community that you admire and respect who isn't that old. However I think it would be a very bad mistake to have a child simply for this reason.

[The Bacon Guy]

Were you loud, messy, and did you cause your parents some worries or headaches?

I don't doubt it for one second.

Was it worth it all because you are who you are, or not?

I would consider myself a nice enough guy and a functioning member of society. But I certainly don't think it was worth eighteen years of anyone's life to produce me or anyone else for that matter.

That answer would determine if you should or should not reproduce your own "little you alls".

SHOULD NOT. DEFINETLY SHOULD NOT. Even if I could produce the next Einstein, I still wouldn't throw away eighteen years of my life for it.

Anyway a current report has indicated that because pirates hate kids we have less pirates in the world and that caused global warming because fewer ships were sunk into the oceans.

Ah, but with global warming, the ice caps melt and cover the world in water. The pirates shall rule the seas once more! HAAAAARRRRRRR!!!

[5010]

I think there are right and wrong reasons for having kids. I think fulfillment is a good enough reason. I think having a kid hoping it will fix a dysfunctional relationship is crazy.

[talinh]

Is it to give your life purpose? "yeah some what"
Do you feel that you are giving back something to society?"why would i want to give back to a society that has condemed me for who i am?"
Does having children give you a sense of importance?"if being able to pass what i know of life to some one who never has knowen this then yes"
Do you just want some company? "ever one needs some one to play with"

Any mothers, fathers or prospective parents - What do you get out of having children?
a since of pride when thay do good lots of gray hairs the joy of knowing that you made and rase a small person to the person thay are today"

i am gonna be a dad soon and it scares me because of the way this world looks at children as just stupid kids and thay dont see the brillance in thare blank qustions
i dont want to raze my kid in this world but i dont care i want my kid to be able to make chosies that thay want kids are gonna be here for long after i am gone at lest i will know i rased one that truely cares

[tivodan1116]

Quote by: The Bacon Guy In my experience, children are expensive, time consuming, loud, demanding, messy and probably the most efficient way of ruining your life I can think of. So why do people do it?

Children can be expensive and they are certainly time consuming. I don't find them to be loud demanding or particularly messy (compared to me--- but then again the wife does a good job of cleaning).

The most efficient way of ruining your life? That's an extremely cynical, and in my opinion, immature view. If your "life" consists of staying out partying all night, drinking too much and abusing drugs, driving recklessly, etc, yes, children will make that difficult. Other than self-destructive behavior like that, I can't think of anything my bachelor friends can do that I can't. Frankly, i can even stay out late and get drunk if i want to, but i've moved beyond that. It's called growing up.

Is it to give your life purpose?

My life has purpose with or without children. Certainly having children adds purpose

Do you feel that you are giving back something to society?

No, at least not through having children.

Does having children give you a sense of importance?

Only to my children.

Do you just want some company?

This is what my wife says - that i want more people to talk to.

Any mothers, fathers or prospective parents - What do you get out of having children? Somebody help me out, because I really feel I must be missing something.

I really enjoy being a dad. It's fun, i love my son, and every day I have something to look forward to.

[Samildanach]

Growing up...I have never really understood this whole growing up malarkey. My gf keeps telling me to grow up, but the way I see it, that means, adopt my considerably more conservative values as your own. Every day I think I grow, but usually only in the direction I want to.
If growing up is growing in the direction that society wants me to, then you can keep it.

[Marilyn Monroe]

Quote by: Kite At this point in my life I really don't want to have kids. They mooch at the beginning, the defy you and scream during the middle, and the ignore and disown you at the end. Children are ungrateful greedy little bastards, and I am ashamed to admit that I am one of them.

I hear ya!

[The Bacon Guy]

The most efficient way of ruining your life? That's an extremely cynical, and in my opinion, immature view. If your "life" consists of staying out partying all night, drinking too much and abusing drugs, driving recklessly, etc, yes, children will make that difficult.

Actually, I rarely drink too much, don't touch drugs and don't drive. Are you assuming that anyone who doesn't have children is a drunk, stoned dangerous driver?

You have said yourself that Children are time consuming. Therefore they would prevent me spending time with my friends, which is a big part of my life. Children tie you down, meaning any career decisions would be influenced by them. Although I'm still a student, my career will be an important part of my life. This is why I think children are a bad idea. Because they hinder the really important things in my life.

If you think that all a life consists of without children is "staying out partying all night, drinking too much and abusing drugs, driving recklessly, etc," then perhaps it is a good thing you had kids.