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Seeker_Of_Sins · Jun 16, 2004, 09:03 pm

A consortium of entertainment industry companies is threatening to take legal action against the US Department of Defense for loss of earnings if promised wars against Syria and Iran are not waged within anticipated timeframes.

The consortium, led by Fox Studios, is angry that large investments in entertainment products already under development may be worthless if pre-emptive strikes do not take place before March.

Fox fears that planned blockbuster Walls of Damascus may prove to be a monumental flop if the invasion of Syria does not occur within the next couple of months. "I'm losing millions by the day here," says Fox chief executive Michael Harvey. "We've got everybody out on location, we've got sets, we've got crews. I've got Joel Schumacher hooked up for this one, I've got [Bruce] Willis. I tell you, if I have to pull the plug on this, somebody's going to pay."

In Walls of Damascus, Willis is scripted to play a maverick Marine Corps sergeant whose platoon is trapped behind enemy lines, but he defies orders to retreat and leads his men to confront and eventually destroy the entire Syrian army, defeating Syrian leader Bashar al-Assad in a climactic fist fight at the end of the film.

There have already been scheduling concerns for Fox after it was forced to can high-tech special-effects thriller WMD: Taken Out during the Iraq war in favour of the more script-heavy Saving Private Jessica. "Yeah, we had to change the concept pretty quickly there," says Harvey. "But we ran with it. I'm a whole lot more worried about this situation, though. And right now, I'm blaming the Pentagon.

"We met with [Deputy Secretary of Defense, Paul] Wolfowitz last spring and he was, like, 'Yeah, yeah, don't worry, Iraq will be like pissing in a pot. Then we'll take Syria, then we'll take Iran.' He even winked at us and said, 'You might be interested to know, there's a rogue East Asian state we've got our eye on.' We based our whole concept planning and timelines on what they assured us was going to go down.

"Now I'm hearing the invasion may not take place at all. Or something about how they want to reconstruct Iraq and establish democracy. Jesus, I can't make a movie of that. You think we can make a film about establishing democracy? You think Americans want to watch some shithole country getting reconstructed?"

Also participating in the class-action suit is computer game giant Take Two Interactive Software, maker of Desert Storm II: Back to Baghdad (available for PlayStation 2 and Xbox). Product development manager James McNeish said the lack of new military operations in the Middle East was a major concern. "We were looking at the Syrian leg as the key in terms of product development," he explains. "To tell you the truth, Back to Baghdad hasn't been doing quite the numbers we hoped. Yeah, we've got some outstanding graphics, but there's a discerning audience out there, and they demand dynamism, multiple levels of combat.

"Now, we all know that the Iraq operation was a bit of a turkey shoot, which we've had to reflect in the game. So you're the commander of an M-43 Abrams tank with a 120mm gun and a top speed of 42mph, and what do you get to confront? Some more losers with rocket-propelled grenades. Bam. People tire of that.

"Syria is a whole different story, though. Good possibilities for full-spectrum combat scenarios. I mean, they've still got MiGs and shit, so we can work in dogfights. And our intelligence team tells us Syria's got mountains, which gives us way more variety for the landscapes. We've got people over there right now, going over the terrain. The prospects are, or should be, mouth-watering."

McNeish is also adamant that the Pentagon is to blame for the risk to his company's investment. "Too bad Rummy couldn't work with us on this one," he says. "Oh well, I guess we'll see them in court."

Privately, many industry representatives admit their greatest fear is that more rogue states might "do a Libya" and seek diplomatic rapprochement with the US before pre-emptive strikes can commence, thus limiting the options for new action-based entertainment. "I'd hate to think we'd have to go back to having Bill Pullman save the world from aliens," says one film industry executive.

Harvey says he spoke for the industry consortium as a whole when he scoffed at suggestions that his movie could go ahead as planned, whether or not an attack on Syria takes place. "Look, 99 percent of your average movie-going public has never even heard of Damascus," he says. "We need the saturation network and cable wartime news coverage to get sufficient product placement to make it work.

"And anyway, we can't make a movie about some kind of fictional event. That is so last century. Do you ever watch TV these days? People want to watch bombs going off and bad guys getting blown away, and know that that's exactly what actually happened in reality."

Compugasm · Jun 16, 2004, 09:19 pm

Hey, I've got an idea. I'm going to sue Take Two Interactive for not delivering a game meeting my expectation on a war that didn't meet their expectation. Hollywood, can't make a movie on a fictional event? In the last paragraph they've spelled out exactly what will make them the most money, and yet they'll sue because reality doesn't meet their expectation? They do these people think we're that stupid?

Sonart · Jun 16, 2004, 09:36 pm

Now that's entertainment.

castille · Jun 16, 2004, 10:46 pm

Um, where is your source for this?

Seeker_Of_Sins · Jun 16, 2004, 10:49 pm

Quote:

Originally posted by castille,
Um, where is your source for this?

These are official records obtained by using the official information act, 2002.

castille · Jun 16, 2004, 10:56 pm

Any serial numbers or reference data or links? I'm curious as to whether this actually happens

Seeker_Of_Sins · Jun 16, 2004, 10:59 pm

Quote:

Originally posted by castille,
Any serial numbers or reference data or links? I'm curious as to whether this actually happens

Castille, I have to apologise, this was a satirical thread, although the temptation to string you along was huge I have decided to resist:)

Sonart · Jun 16, 2004, 11:52 pm

I thought it was hilarious, Seeker, but, yeah, you have to be careful around here. If you've seen any of the incredible conspiracy crap floating around on some of these threads, you'd realize that a lot of folk here will believe just about anything.

LogicaLunatic · Jun 17, 2004, 12:53 am

Good one :)

Paavo · Jun 17, 2004, 01:42 am

I saw that too. Took a screenshot:

(you're so incredibly lame, paavo...)

PatrickHenry · Jun 17, 2004, 12:26 pm

Butterface

Compugasm · Jun 17, 2004, 12:37 pm

The Listener has the article written by Simon Bidwell. Michael Harvey works for FOX Australia.

PatrickHenry · Jun 17, 2004, 12:40 pm

Quote:

Originally posted by Seeker_Of_Sins,+--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (Seeker_Of_Sins,)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'><!--QuoteBegin-castille,
Any serial numbers or reference data or links? I'm curious as to whether this actually happens

Castille, I have to apologise, this was a satirical thread, although the temptation to string you along was huge I have decided to resist:)[/b][/quote]WTF? What kind of game are you playing? If this is your tecnique, you're gonna get it!

Seeker_Of_Sins · Jun 17, 2004, 08:04 pm

Quote:

Quote by: PatrickHenry,

Castille, I have to apologise, this was a satirical thread, although the temptation to string you along was huge I have decided to resist:)

WTF? What kind of game are you playing? If this is your tecnique, you're gonna get it![/quote]

Get it?

what does that mean? Doe's it mean you can't see the funny side of certain things or is it a personal warning?

Either way, I feel you might need to lighten up

Mr.Vicchio · Jun 17, 2004, 09:08 pm

People around here... lighten up...??? Thats funny.

samsara15 · Jun 17, 2004, 09:22 pm

This thread is obviously real. How else do we explain the messed up situation. Bush is not to blame...he had to do what he did to keep the ratings up. Could Kerry keep the ratings up as well? My God, look at all the sexual antics Clinton had to perform to keep his own ratings up. It's hard work being President.

castille · Jun 18, 2004, 06:43 am

This was posted in the Politics thread, which generally indicates it is serious.

However since I know this stuff can't happen, I figured it was a conspiracy thread (and that the poster was serious about it).

dotcoma · Jun 18, 2004, 12:14 pm

Quote:

Originally posted by Sonart,
I thought it was hilarious, Seeker, but, yeah, you have to be careful around here. If you've seen any of the incredible conspiracy crap floating around on some of these threads, you'd realize that a lot of folk here will believe just about anything.

Point it out. Show us the crap.

Jun 16, 2004, 09:03 pm	#1 (permalink) (top)
Seeker_Of_Sins Go the Crusaders Posts: 671	A consortium of entertainment industry companies is threatening to take legal action against the US Department of Defense for loss of earnings if promised wars against Syria and Iran are not waged within anticipated timeframes. The consortium, led by Fox Studios, is angry that large investments in entertainment products already under development may be worthless if pre-emptive strikes do not take place before March. Fox fears that planned blockbuster Walls of Damascus may prove to be a monumental flop if the invasion of Syria does not occur within the next couple of months. "I'm losing millions by the day here," says Fox chief executive Michael Harvey. "We've got everybody out on location, we've got sets, we've got crews. I've got Joel Schumacher hooked up for this one, I've got [Bruce] Willis. I tell you, if I have to pull the plug on this, somebody's going to pay." In Walls of Damascus, Willis is scripted to play a maverick Marine Corps sergeant whose platoon is trapped behind enemy lines, but he defies orders to retreat and leads his men to confront and eventually destroy the entire Syrian army, defeating Syrian leader Bashar al-Assad in a climactic fist fight at the end of the film. There have already been scheduling concerns for Fox after it was forced to can high-tech special-effects thriller WMD: Taken Out during the Iraq war in favour of the more script-heavy Saving Private Jessica. "Yeah, we had to change the concept pretty quickly there," says Harvey. "But we ran with it. I'm a whole lot more worried about this situation, though. And right now, I'm blaming the Pentagon. "We met with [Deputy Secretary of Defense, Paul] Wolfowitz last spring and he was, like, 'Yeah, yeah, don't worry, Iraq will be like pissing in a pot. Then we'll take Syria, then we'll take Iran.' He even winked at us and said, 'You might be interested to know, there's a rogue East Asian state we've got our eye on.' We based our whole concept planning and timelines on what they assured us was going to go down. "Now I'm hearing the invasion may not take place at all. Or something about how they want to reconstruct Iraq and establish democracy. Jesus, I can't make a movie of that. You think we can make a film about establishing democracy? You think Americans want to watch some shithole country getting reconstructed?" Also participating in the class-action suit is computer game giant Take Two Interactive Software, maker of Desert Storm II: Back to Baghdad (available for PlayStation 2 and Xbox). Product development manager James McNeish said the lack of new military operations in the Middle East was a major concern. "We were looking at the Syrian leg as the key in terms of product development," he explains. "To tell you the truth, Back to Baghdad hasn't been doing quite the numbers we hoped. Yeah, we've got some outstanding graphics, but there's a discerning audience out there, and they demand dynamism, multiple levels of combat. "Now, we all know that the Iraq operation was a bit of a turkey shoot, which we've had to reflect in the game. So you're the commander of an M-43 Abrams tank with a 120mm gun and a top speed of 42mph, and what do you get to confront? Some more losers with rocket-propelled grenades. Bam. People tire of that. "Syria is a whole different story, though. Good possibilities for full-spectrum combat scenarios. I mean, they've still got MiGs and shit, so we can work in dogfights. And our intelligence team tells us Syria's got mountains, which gives us way more variety for the landscapes. We've got people over there right now, going over the terrain. The prospects are, or should be, mouth-watering." McNeish is also adamant that the Pentagon is to blame for the risk to his company's investment. "Too bad Rummy couldn't work with us on this one," he says. "Oh well, I guess we'll see them in court." Privately, many industry representatives admit their greatest fear is that more rogue states might "do a Libya" and seek diplomatic rapprochement with the US before pre-emptive strikes can commence, thus limiting the options for new action-based entertainment. "I'd hate to think we'd have to go back to having Bill Pullman save the world from aliens," says one film industry executive. Harvey says he spoke for the industry consortium as a whole when he scoffed at suggestions that his movie could go ahead as planned, whether or not an attack on Syria takes place. "Look, 99 percent of your average movie-going public has never even heard of Damascus," he says. "We need the saturation network and cable wartime news coverage to get sufficient product placement to make it work. "And anyway, we can't make a movie about some kind of fictional event. That is so last century. Do you ever watch TV these days? People want to watch bombs going off and bad guys getting blown away, and know that that's exactly what actually happened in reality." You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, Or get married and wish you were dead.

Jun 16, 2004, 09:19 pm	#2 (permalink) (top)
Compugasm Son of X51 Location: San Diego Posts: 3,739	Hey, I've got an idea. I'm going to sue Take Two Interactive for not delivering a game meeting my expectation on a war that didn't meet their expectation. Hollywood, can't make a movie on a fictional event? In the last paragraph they've spelled out exactly what will make them the most money, and yet they'll sue because reality doesn't meet their expectation? They do these people think we're that stupid? I'd like to thank Charlie Hodge, bringing me scarves and water.

Jun 16, 2004, 09:36 pm	#3 (permalink) (top)
Sonart It's simply logical Location: San Diego Posts: 4,333	Now that's entertainment. I don't suffer from insanity... I thoroughly enjoy it

Jun 16, 2004, 10:46 pm	#4 (permalink) (top)
castille Citizen #21521 Posts: 2,599	Um, where is your source for this? Ideological loyalty is the act of giving your soul to a vague concept, to be manipulated by people smarter than you.

Jun 16, 2004, 10:56 pm	#6 (permalink) (top)
castille Citizen #21521 Posts: 2,599	Any serial numbers or reference data or links? I'm curious as to whether this actually happens Ideological loyalty is the act of giving your soul to a vague concept, to be manipulated by people smarter than you.

Jun 16, 2004, 11:52 pm	#8 (permalink) (top)
Sonart It's simply logical Location: San Diego Posts: 4,333	I thought it was hilarious, Seeker, but, yeah, you have to be careful around here. If you've seen any of the incredible conspiracy crap floating around on some of these threads, you'd realize that a lot of folk here will believe just about anything. I don't suffer from insanity... I thoroughly enjoy it

Jun 17, 2004, 12:53 am	#9 (permalink) (top)
LogicaLunatic Hrm... Location: MN Posts: 445	Good one :) "Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive." -- Wallace Irwin

Jun 17, 2004, 01:42 am	#10 (permalink) (top)
Paavo Location: Finland Posts: 712	I saw that too. Took a screenshot: (you're so incredibly lame, paavo...)

Jun 17, 2004, 12:26 pm	#11 (permalink) (top)
PatrickHenry 9/11: Inside Job Location: Hawai'i, Big Island Posts: 10,438	Butterface "Arms in the hands of the citizens may be used at individual discretion for the defense of the country, the overthrow of tyranny or private self-defense." -- John Adams

Jun 17, 2004, 12:37 pm	#12 (permalink) (top)
Compugasm Son of X51 Location: San Diego Posts: 3,739	The Listener has the article written by Simon Bidwell. Michael Harvey works for FOX Australia. I'd like to thank Charlie Hodge, bringing me scarves and water.

Jun 17, 2004, 09:08 pm	#15 (permalink) (top)
Mr.Vicchio Navy Veteran Location: Texas Posts: 6,031	People around here... lighten up...??? Thats funny. Einstein's "Theory of Relativity" is still being challenged to this day, but by consensus Global Warming is a fact... that's REAL science at work, why didn't Albert just go that route?

Jun 17, 2004, 09:22 pm	#16 (permalink) (top)
samsara15 Ch Latour 61 Location: Maryland Posts: 646	This thread is obviously real. How else do we explain the messed up situation. Bush is not to blame...he had to do what he did to keep the ratings up. Could Kerry keep the ratings up as well? My God, look at all the sexual antics Clinton had to perform to keep his own ratings up. It's hard work being President. Economic Left/Right -8.88 Social Libertarian/Authoritarian –6.97

Jun 18, 2004, 06:43 am	#17 (permalink) (top)
castille Citizen #21521 Posts: 2,599	This was posted in the Politics thread, which generally indicates it is serious. However since I know this stuff can't happen, I figured it was a conspiracy thread (and that the poster was serious about it). Ideological loyalty is the act of giving your soul to a vague concept, to be manipulated by people smarter than you.