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**Jack** · Sep 27, 2006, 02:10 am

Quote:

Maybe all the other gays/bisexuals out there find it easier ot hide things, but I have found that it has been impossible ot avoid those around me finding out so far.

Those of us who got good at hiding it often did so in a more restrictive era. As odd as it seems, despite the aura of free love, the 60s were still not a good time to try to come out. I didn't even consider the possibility until near the end of the 70s. Read Christopher Isherwood's books for a very well described portrait of gay life in the 30s and 40s. I would venture to guess that the majority of gays and bi's over 40 have learned to hide very well...unless their last name is Simmons.

underbear1 · Sep 27, 2006, 02:54 am

Gay/lesbian run the full gamut from totally obvious to undetectable. I know several men and womyn who couldn't have passed in the straight world if their lives depended on it.
As I became more self accepting in the mid seventies, I was in a relationship with a somewhat closeted man for 7 years,(he had 2 daughters from an earlier marriage who didn't know, and wasn't out at his job.) I wasn't out to my parent, but one brother and sister-in-law knew. We would go out dancing at gay clubs, had several drag queens as friends, were members at MCC church, and even created a couple's monthly event, because we had different priorities as couples than our single friends. I felt as I became more accepting of myself, I was more obvious to others, and through association my partner was more exposed too. I can still pass as straight if I choose to, but it rarely comes up, since I choose to live fairly removed from heterosexual contact.

Sep 27, 2006, 02:54 am	#42 (permalink) (top)
underbear1 BANNED Posts: 2,630	Gay/lesbian run the full gamut from totally obvious to undetectable. I know several men and womyn who couldn't have passed in the straight world if their lives depended on it. As I became more self accepting in the mid seventies, I was in a relationship with a somewhat closeted man for 7 years,(he had 2 daughters from an earlier marriage who didn't know, and wasn't out at his job.) I wasn't out to my parent, but one brother and sister-in-law knew. We would go out dancing at gay clubs, had several drag queens as friends, were members at MCC church, and even created a couple's monthly event, because we had different priorities as couples than our single friends. I felt as I became more accepting of myself, I was more obvious to others, and through association my partner was more exposed too. I can still pass as straight if I choose to, but it rarely comes up, since I choose to live fairly removed from heterosexual contact.