Quote:
Originally posted by Ken Carman,
One of the most basic fallacies is that we are each separate individuals, each responsible for only ourselves, that all we have to do when we fall is pick ourselves up and start to walk again. The reality is that there are plenty of people who out of indifference, greed, a desire to advance by stepping on others or just sadism, who are eager to trip us, prevent us from achieving and sometimes even just surviving; no matter how hard we try to pick ourselves up and walk again. |
I agree with the statement above 100%.
One of the reasons why I have never been able to embrace and assimilate into the American culture 100% is because I see the opposite of this belief in the minds of a lot of people, I would even say most people - though they don't necessarily express it directly.
(And please let's not start with the childidsh "Oh, but not everybody is like that". Yeah, I know. A lot are, though. More than I care to see.)
I have never seen a people so cilvil, similey and polite on the outside yet so detached, careless and disconnected from the rest of society, FROM OTHER PEOPLE, on the inside - than the American people. Most only think in terms of themselves and at best, their immediate families - and that's it. Everything else has little relation or relevance to them.
It's almost as if they do not really care to live in a social mindset, among people like themselves -- society is there only to make some things function for them and help create creature comforts for the individual ...but it's not a warm, family-like group that they feel they actually BELONG TO.
The waiving of the flag and that kind of plastic patriotism with "we support our troups"...(but then we tell veterans they signed a contract before they lost limbs so it's their problem, take responsibility!!) does nothing but disgust me even more.
This in itself created a huge void in me since I came here 7 years ago. My husband (who is American) is saddened to see that I cannot find my peace in this culture no matter how much I try. He is a wonderful human being, I love him immensly... but of course, it is easier for him to survive here simply because he was born here and he is used to whatever culture he found when he came on this earth.
But today, after having visited many other places and cultures, my family included, he understands what I am talking about. He ardently wants to retire in Europe...but we are very far away from retirement.
I honestly believe that this kind of socially disconnected, "me-blind" psychology that the American people has come to promote as "virtue"...is directly related to the kind of people that decided to come here in the first place. The "founders".
Yes, we talked about the bright side of those people: they were pioneers, desirous of freedom, courageous, daring, not afraid of shit, whatever.
But all reality has 2 sides. What type of people are willing to leave an entire society behind, the familiar, the warm, the people you're used to see, the ways in which things are done in the place you were born - to go live in no man's land?
People who were never integrated in it to begin with!!. The Loners, often the sociopaths, the disconnected, the weird, the fundamentalists (who would rather talk to "God" on their own for the rest of their lives than talk to another human being ever again).
And don't give me the bull with "they ran away from the "wrongs" of Europeans. Save murder... right or wrong, people adapt to the way things are done in the place where they are born. It's called home and it's called comfort. It's called social integration. It takes a maladapted loner to want to run away from everything they've ever known and into a deserted new land...to get something like this.
I would definitely not expect compassion and a sense of belonging to society - ANY society !!- from people like this. These founders only created a "society" that you don't need to and shouldn't even bother to actually BELONG TO or think too much about. All you need to think about is YOURSELF. (By the way, psychiatrist will tell you that this is the first step to mental illness).
And this is what they are so proud of.
Yes, thye are hard-working and determined (to do what?); Of course you will be! what the heck are you going to do all the time when you could go years without exchaging two significant words with another human being? You will freaking work hard (not sure for what). It'll get in your blood. But it is not enough to work hard (with selfish thoughts only!) to be declared a good, decent human being.
Human beings are social animals. The deviations from this norm are freaks of nature, as far as I am concerned.
It is this kind of people who will believe Society owes you nothing and you owe nothing to Society. They are only separate atoms in this world and I have serious problems with people shaped and formed by this type of mentality telling the rest of the world about compassion, democracy, humanity, understanding and the like.
The American people are all about
: "Leave me alone, I want to make my money, get out of my way".I personally do not want to see a world like this for tomorrow.
At this point, I would prefer to see less phony "civility" and "hard-work" and more genuine interest in each other,more warmth and humanity in this world.