Quote:
[Does this denegrate or lessen the importance of other jobs? Not at all. I'm merely trying to put things in perspective. Raising a child is a monumental task to undertake which is why we have people/moms like those mentioned...they aren't prepared for it or they simply can't deal with it. They discover that they aren't willing to sacrifice their time, their very life, to meet the almost constant demands of another human being. So instead they whine and moan and behave like spoiled brats because their "dollie" isn't turning out to be as fun as they dreamed it would be. |
Leebert,
This is an awsome post, much more eloquent than I managed to make mine sound.
Yes, you pinpointed two aspects that I failed to emphasize, though I mentioned them in passing:
1. The framework for this discussion IS the free-market, capitalist system where pretty much everyone is supposed to be "in" for themselves (meaning they and their immediate families). Not my favorite system and way of looking at life and the world, but this is what we have right now and this is the system we and our kids will have to deal with and survive in.
2. Being a "good parent" IS a monumental task. But then again, this would be in a framework/system where humanity and human beings would be oficially valued by society, not only in words, but also in deeds.
As you said, in economic terms, this is not the case: a stay-at-home parent is paid nothing, a teacher's pay (closest thing to a mom) is mockery.
The reason a stay-at-home mom is paid nothing is the reflection of the fact that the capitalist society defines that kid as "your problem/ your choice/your decision - nothing to pay you for".
Never mind that you create labor for the economic engine later.
Same with the teachers. Never mind that you actually shape labor for the economic engine to work.
If education were not mandatory so that the capitalist engine can function properly, and if it were just a "service" to be bought from private providers (teachers) - such as health fro\m doctors...- then we would see how the wallets of teachers would look like.
So then here comes the working dad. In order to have a monumental mom at home, you better have a monumental dad who puts up with all the bulshitt in the public sphere, where he must earn a living - so that the mom can do that "monumental" task at home.
THAT I cannot forget. Under the current system, with the way values are defined, what dads to is more importsnt to me than what moms do.
I know what you are getting at by saying that we are looking at this from the "wrong perspective"...And I completely agree...but I am afraid that people cannot afford NOT TO look at parenthood from this wrong perspective, given the realities of the market.