[Maryjane]

[quote]

Quote by: Radarlove Maryjane, First, I am confused about who you really are.

I don't know why you are confused?

By chance, I came across your profile page where a picture of what appears to be a strong, good-looking, muscular man, wearing shorts and T-shirt, as if he has just returned from a strenuous work-out in the gym, is placed under the profile name Maryjane. Is this actually you and you're pretending to be a woman? or is it an image of your husband who has died? Or were you involved in a gay marriage?

Oh, I know who intentionally looks at my profile. Funny how their name pops up shortly after we've shared a differing opinion. It says right in my profile that the photograph is that of my late husband. He was a good looking fellow and no, he didn't go to the gym, he worked construction and played ice hockey. I have no reason to "lie" about who or what I am.Two members of Volconvo can vouch for me. One I interact with on a daily basis and the other I've met twice in real life. FYI, My name really is Maryjane.

Why would it matter if it was a homosexual relationship?

My comment has nothing to do with attitude. I am merely making a subjective point. I could just as easily turn your argument around and state many atheists I meet have a serious attitude about anyone who doesn't agree with them. Offering an opposite opinion is healthy, in my view. Without this, there might not be debates. How boring life would be then.

Stop back peddling. I didn't ask for your credentials nor do I care. Your snarky comments on this thread and the other scream attitude. You keep dissing people for being atheists like it's the only reason they won't take your word for things. If you want to try to impress people, offer up some kind of proof. Any fool can take someone elses opinions and turn it into their own. What I'm offering is a different perspective. My own. I'm not asking you to agree with me.

I have spoken to many who have lost loved ones. Only a few weeks ago I conversed with a 70 year-old woman who had recently lost her husband. After the funeral and wake, she came back home alone, to find her husband, looking alive and well, sitting on the lounge sofa. They had a 10 minute conversation before he suddenly disappeared. Is this what you mean by a lucid dream? If so, I would not.

No, I'd say she was delusional. Reminds me of the story I read the other day about eldery lady. Her husband had a heart attack and died. His body weight trapped her legs so she had to sit under him for a couple of days till help arrived. She believed he was asleep.

Some might say the woman had a chat with the ghost or spirit of her husband. The atheists might say, the woman was so grief-stricken that the mind had created this imaginary scenario as a sense of comfort and a way of denying his death.

Careful, there you go with the atheist thing again. Many of my widowed christian friends would say the same.

My understanding of a lucid dream is that while asleep, the dream seems so real, you believe it is actually occurring. i.e it is not the mind simply enjoying some mental masturbation of random events.

I've already given you my anedotal evidence of a lucid dream. Here's another. After my husband died, his partner tried to take advantage of me financially. I was up to my eyeballs in lawyers and CPA's. If ever there was a time I "needed" to communicate with him, this was it. I needed to know the ins and outs of their working relationship so I could make a decision whether nor not to "kick over the bees nest." I was ready to let it all go, I was mentally exhausted from fighting and trying to grieve at the same time. He never did answer my questions but at one point in our "conversation" he smiled at me like he always did when he knew I could handle things. That's when I became aware that I was in a dream and there's no way I would let his partner steal my husband's legacy from my boys and I. So no, these were not random events or mental masturbation, it was my minds own way of sorting out what actions to take.

Now, it is all down to your beliefs. The atheists might say, this was your mind finding a way of coming to terms with her death. Others might say you were actually with her in spirit whilst asleep and because of the emotional power involved, you remembered the event whilst it was occurring and then afterwards on awaking.

It's how your mind copes. Most of the religious people I know believe in psychics, finding coins, cell phones going off ...in other words... signs from beyond. If that brings them comfort...so? Makes me wonder if they find another love is their deceased spouse watching them in the bedroom too?

You come over as someone who has genuinely researched this area with some care. And I accept your views may have little to do with atheism although I do note you are a group member of Atheists and Agnostics.

I find your obsession disturbing....

I agree with davedes. You do not have to be religious to be spiritual. I go to the grave site. I know he's not there. For some odd reason it's comforting to sit next to him. I'm having a garage built with the inheritence from his parent's recent death. It's what he always dreamed of and he's going to get it. Silly and irrational of me to think that way I know...Most of all, I try to be more like him in my every day life. His legacy isn't in physical things, it's in the ways he enriched our lives.

In Britain, we have a well-known former TV news presenter called John Humphreys. He now works on BBC radio. In the twilight of his years, he wanted to research the afterlife and his experiences led to a book, published last September, called In God We Doubt. As the headline screams, He went looking for God and ended up an angry agnostic. While one part of him wanted to 'believe', another part was unable to after looking at the religious evidence. In God we doubt -Times Online

Yea? So? People are always searching for answers. Some find it in religion, other's don't.

My suggestion would be to keep God well and truly out of it. I am not religious and don't accept there is a benevolent God. Like you, I have studied the evidence thoroughly BUT unlike you, come to the opposite conclusion that there is an afterlife - although it has nothing to do with the religious viewpoint. I am happy and comfortable with my own conclusions. There is little more I can say.

Losing a parent isn't like losing a spouse. There's an intimacy shared that is beyond compare. I'll always be connected to him even if it's in my minds eye. I know all I need to know. I'm happy with my conclusions as well. Now that you know all you need to know about me, can we leave the personal's out of debate?