Here is a example from the Book by Alan Watts called "The taboo agenst knowing who you are. His philosophy is a "must read" for those interested in getting into the topic called "being your self".
Alan Watts THE BOOK Chapter I
Rebelling and conforming is not how to be yourself, which is what I attempted to relate.
Of course I have been involved in meditation, solitude theorpy, bio-feedback, guided meditations, nature walks, self reflection, and philosophy.
The self cannot seek to find the self because the self is the seeker. Sort of like the idea that the eye cannot see the eye. And a mirror is not the same thing as the real thing. And Moses already used the term "I Am that I Am" as a name representing God.
In the solitude of a think tank you can become conscious of the self but you are limiting that self to "thoughts only". From another perspective you might define the self as your body, a bag of bones wrapped in skin. Or you could put them together and get a "thinking body with individual aspects". Then you can get some make up, some personality masks, some clothing, and a car to use as one of your external "self" images. And with some creativity you could become the fantasy self of your own imagination.
But a case could be made to suggest that the self does not stop at the outer layer of the skin. They say that beauty is only skin deep and so we came up with an idea of finding that "inner person" - so as not to judge a book by it's cover". But again, the fact is that "self" also goes far beyond just our human form, as we breathe air, consume water and food, and interact with nature, human technology, and a culture ( sometimes more then one culture). In other words, we can comprehend that the self is the whole earth, or the whole universe, and that we are part of our (larger) Self.
Just like your toe nail is part of your "human body self" we as the total human are part of yet another "extended self" which is nature (aka - the whole environment).
And so you see we can have a number of different ideas about what all would consitute a "self". For we are as much a part of the surroundings as we are a part of thoughts, our personal body, and our feelings and sensitivities. And so finding yourself is finding that note that you are that is in harmony with the whole song. This would be best explained in more poetic ways. But perhaps you all get the drift anyway?
Perhaps the Book of Tao best explains this idea.