| Actually, the military stance on gays derives from its stance on heteros.
If you are a military member, there are actual rules against public displays of affection. They are little known, but the military derives the, "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy from there.
In fact, the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy basically makes it pretty clear that your personal life is your own business. If you choose the advertise, the military boots you.
Consider that in many "closed world" situations, like most naval vessels, there is no co-ed operations.
A gay man in an environment of men is the same as a woman in that environment.
That's the second basis for the concept.
This is the explanation I was given when I asked a question along lines similar to this thread. |